Karrine Steffans: The Vixen Manual: How to Find, Seduce & Keep the Man You Want
This chick has a lot of nerve. Karine Steffans, otherwise known as "Superhead" (a nickname she got after orally pleasuring, and on most occasions sleeping with, nearly every man in the hip-hop industry — from Ja Rule to Irv Gotti, Jay-Z, DMX, Bobby Brown, and on and on), is now attempting to reinvent herself as "Vixen," a confident and self-reliable woman who has made mistakes but learned from them and now wishes to share her wisdom with the masses. Give me a break. I've never bought her whole "I-was-so-naive-that-people-took-advantage" act. Steffans knew exactly what she was doing before, during and after her sordid little sexcapades (and when she decided to capitalize off of them by publishing a book airing out everyone's dirty laundry). Nothing about her alleged reinvention feels genuine. Just months ago, she put a video on YouTube where she mocked a celebrity lover for asking to use anal sex toys during their trysts — and now she's a relationship doctor? Give me a break!
But, since we're trying NOT to judge a book by its cover (in this case, the photo of the scantily-clad author on the cover), let's get to the juicy stuff. What advice does Steffans have to offer? Well, there are some obvious truisms in there. For example, she writes that, "One of the primary keys to a healthy relationship is for both of you, though no longer single, to remain singular." It's absolutely true -- women have the tendency to get so consumed by their relationships that they can forget to do things for themselves, to foster their own friendships, and to pursue their own dreams, so it's imperative that they always hold on to their individual identities. She also talks about being consistent and how men pick up on any small change — especially when it comes to how they're being treated (also quite true). She also advises women to use their intuition and to address any lies told my a man, as a relationship built on untruths can't possibly be successful. But the problem is that, even as she regurgitates these well-known truths, she doesn't go beyond them to offer real, practical advice. For example, what's the difference between a woman being paranoid about her man's whereabouts and her using her intuition? How can women tell the difference? If a woman catches a man lying, what exactly should she do? What lies are forgivable and which aren't? The answers to these questions aren't as simple as they sound.
And then, of course, there's the truckload of terrible advice she unleashes. For example, she suggests that women date (and sleep with) multiple men simultaneously. I'd content that doing so would prevent a woman from actually investing in seeing where any one relationship could go (and, quite frankly, it just seems skanky). She also says that, if a man breaks one of the rules in the relationship (such as coming in at an outrageous hour), you shouldn't argue with him when he walks in the door but, rather, take off his shoes and pamper him. Huh? I can understand not arguing as he sets foot inside the house, but treating the man for acting like a selfish bastard? Not so much.
Now, I expected Steffans to at least dispense some steamy sex advice. But instead, she offered the most run-of-the-mill insights — even the diagrams of sexual positions are boring and predictable. Really, it's a darned shame that she couldn't at the very least share some tips on what earned her the name Superhead.
Perhaps what made me the angriest in regards to this book, however, was that Steffans lies in order to make herself appear like a person of substance. For example, she has a chapter devoted to single mothers and how they should go about dating and she suggests that they only date while their child is sleeping, that they ask a trusted friend or family member to babysit, and that they come home before the child awakes in the morning. Now, this advice is great — except for the fact that Steffans herself rarely took it. If you're familiar with her past books (especially Confessions of A Video Vixen), then you already know about the days and weeks she spent holed up in hotel rooms with the likes of Allen Iverson and Ja Rule. For her to even depict herself as some model mother is laughable, and it renders her advice moot.
She may now how to seduce a man, but how to foster and maintain a healthy relationship? I'm not so sure, folks.
(*)Isa Chandra Moskowitz: Vegan Brunch: Homestyle Recipes Worth Waking Up For-From Asparagus Omelets to Pumpkin Pancakes (Paperback)
Who knew there were even this many brunch dishes in existence? In Vegan Brunch, Isa Chanda Moskowitz offers a hearty collection of dishes — there's every kind of waffle imaginable (old-fashioned, chocolate beer, gingerbread, buckwheat, cornbread and peanut butter ones), a bevvy of muffin recipes (cocoa raspbery, cranberry orange nut, coconut and mango, pumpkin bran, lemon poppy seed, etc.), as well as omelet/egg alternatives (tofu omelets, sesame scrambled tofu,broccoli quiche, etc.) and side dishes ranging from the common (baked hash browns, for example) to the original and ethnic-inspired (Peruvian home fries, Samosa mashed potato pancakes, jalapeno grits, etc.).
I found the "Bread Basket" and "The Sweet" chapters to be particularly satisfying since the recipes were yummy and easy to follow. Oddly enough, though, all the recipes in the book are written as paragraphs rather than step-by-step instructions, which does make thinks a bit harder for novice cooks (especially when the dishes are more complex).
My only complaint about this book is that some of the ingredients are extremely hard to find — especially if you don't live in a city filled with health food emporiums (and, also, if you don't have the deep pockets to shop at Whole Foods on a regular basis). It's difficult enough to find almond milk, nevermind nutritional yeast, nonhydrogenated margarine, chickpea flour, arrowroot, and tempeh. That's one of the reasons why I suggest starting with the pancake, waffle and muffin recipes, as they require less complex and more readily available ingredients. Once you start cooking, you'll be more than satisfied.
(***)Giulia Melucci: I Loved, I Lost, I Made Spaghetti
Borrowing a page from such Latino literature classics as Like Water for Chocolate, Giulia Melucci pens a romance-centered memoir filled with references to food. In Melucci's case, though, there's no real poetry or magic to these culinary references — they're rather literal (if at times humorous) allusions to foods her Italian mother cooked for her as a child or the many pasta dishes she experimented with as a twenty-something magazine writer/publicist in New York City. She, in fact, peppers her prose with actual recipes for the dishes that best encapsulated certain moments or experiences. Sadly, the recipes are pedestrian at best, with little culinary value to anyone with more than 50 hours logged in the kitchen.
Culinary value aside, there are perhaps some details regarding Melucci's upbringing in a Sicilian household in the Bayridge section of Brooklyn that would strike a chord with other readers who share similar childhood memories. Similarly, her late entry into the dating world and the clumsiness with which she approached men throughout her 20s, might be considered charming by some. Personally, I found that her story lacked the universal appeal necessary to make a memoir go beyond the self and the singular experience and touch people from widely different backgrounds.
For one, Melucci's prose is often dry and stale, devoid of any in-depth reflection (beyond the occasional self-deprecating joke) or vulnerability (her inability to truly show emotion makes her appear guarded and therefore lessens the intensity and power of her story). But, more importantly, there's a very distinct bourgeois air to her writing that makes it hard for those without a middle-class background to relate. She frowns at Ronzoni pasta as if it were beneath her, describes trips to Dean & Deluca (an overpriced store frequented by those with entirely too much money to waste), talks about ordering from the LL Bean catalog (doesn't get much whiter than that), and so forth. Her experiences, then, are those of a woman from a conservative (and financially comfortable) two-parent Italian household, and her failed romance tales pale in comparison to some of the natural disasters other women have endured. Sure, the title is cute but, beyond that, there's very little sauciness or zest to this literary dish.
(**)Debra Goldstein and Olivia Baniuszewicz: Flirtexting: How to Text Your Way to His Heart
This book's premise is simple enough: you can't expect to abide by dated communication methods when engaging with the opposite sex in today's fast-paced, technologically-advanced world. More and more young men and women are trading in phone conversations for snappy, to-the-point text messages when trying to catch the attention of a potential fling, date or mate. So, of course, Debra Goldstein and Olivia Baniuszewicz set out to offer women a point-by-point, step-by-step guide on how to pique a man's curiosity via text, how to convey your feelings towards him based on the tone of your response (and the time it took you to reply), how to get sexy (without being scandalous) over text, and what the various etiquette rules are in the world of "flirtexting."
Now, as a concept, the book seems like a welcome addition to the plethora of how-to-snag-a-man handbooks out there, one that's timely and that speaks to a multi-tasking, on-the-go type of woman. But there's a flip side to that argument: if a woman can't be bothered with reading anything message longer than 200-something characters, how on Earth can she be expected to purchase a book on the topic? The generational attention deficit disorder that the authors address as one of the reasons why texting has become so prevalent can also be cited as a deterrent to potential readers of this book.
In terms of the actual advice given, most of it feels like a 2.0 version of "The Rules" in that the authors encourage women to play silly games in order to appear more/less interested in the guy at hand, provide cookie-cutter "clever" responses for run-of-the-mill texts, and generally encourage all the "thrill of the chase" clichés. Me? I'm 30. I'm too old for all that mess. I'm keeping it 100% whether it be over text, e-mail, phone or verbal communication.
And, truth be told, ladies, some of their "advice" is just plain ol' common sense. If he doesn't text you back, like ever, he's not interested. And if you're mad about something, you should probably have a face-to-face (or at the very least, a phone conversation) instead of sending a text. Now, did you really need a book for that?
(*)Luke Crisell: On the Record: The Scratch DJ Academy Guide
If you've ever considered becoming a DJ, you should definitely consider adding this to your collection of reference books. It covers quite a bit of ground: the histories of both the hip-hop and house DJs, the ways in which various DJs have made a living out of their craft, the basic techniques (mixing, blending, scratching, etc.) and tricks, the importance of record selection in various DJ scenarios, and much more.
Still, there are a few limitations. The DJ 101 section, for one, focuses on turntablism and hence utilizes a turntable set-up with vinyl records as the exemplary setup. In reality, however, most DJS nowadays, prefer to carry their laptops to gigs, utilizing sophisticated computer programs to execute certain tricks. Also, while in "The Life of the DJ" chapter great attention is paid to successful, globe-trotting personalities who have managed to brand themselves (such as DJ AM), very little is discussed about the difficulties of breaking into the game. Most of all, however, On the Record's biggest flaw is its veritable dismissal of both the challenges and opportunities DJs face in an increasingly digital world (even the discussion of social networking sites and online music sites is minimal) and the ways in which future generations of DJs need to adapt in order to succeed.
Still, thanks to interviews with DJ A-Trak, Junior Sanchez, DJ AM, Sasha, Jazzy Jeff, Grandmaster Caz, Skribble, Rob Swift, Paul Oakenfold, and Stretch Armstrong, among other notables, this book does offer the most in-depth, candid look to date at DJ'ing as both an art form and a career choice.
(****)Thembisa S. Mshaka: Put Your Dreams First: Handle Your [entertainment] Business
Veteran songwriter Thembisa Mshaka offers women a no-nonsense, insider's look at the entertainment business and the challenges unique to women working in this realm. Rather than just offer vague, abstract truisms of the "be dedicated" and "maintain your professionalism" variety, Mshaka addresses the various ways in which women come into the business, how to create and maintain a proper image, the challenges of balancing family and work, how to negotiate in various different scenarios, and more.
What makes this such an essential read is that Mshaka draws upon the experiences of numerous power players in different areas of the entertainment industry: from music publicists Yvette Noel-Schure (who reps Beyoncé, among others), Tracii McGregor and Fiona Bloom, to West Coast MC Mystic, LATINA Editor-in-Chief Mimi Valdes-Ryan, celebrity makeup artist Aliesh Pierce, talent agent Jennifer Coles,and web producer Alyce Emory (among many others).It's the anecdotes shared by these women that gives Put Your Dreams First its punch.
There are, however, a few problems with the book. For one, it's overly ambitious in its attempts to cover so much ground which, of course, means it can seem lopsided at times, with certain realms of the entertainment business (such as songwriting, music recording, and publicity) discussed at length, and others merely mentioned in passing. Second, structurally speaking, the text jumps from one place to the next, without a cohesive, seamless thematic thread. Still, these logistical difficulties aside, there are some brilliant words of wisdom contained therein — and that alone makes this necessary reading for any woman trying to leave a mark in the game.
(***)Laird Borrelli-Persson: The Cocktail Dress
Full of potential and extremely well-researched, this ode to the cocktail dress only falls short of expectations due to its brevity and some structural deficiencies. The main chunk of text consists of a 25-paged introduction (and note: only about half of that is actual copy) in which Borrelli-Persson discusses the emergence of the cocktail dress, its evolution throughout the eras, the dominant players in each decade, and how the design changes reflected the mood and sensibilities of the time.
Borrelli-Persson's prose is clever and witty, her voice decisive and confident. If anything, the reader wants more detail from the distinguished author, more examples of her arguments about the interconnectedness between each decade's design sensibilities and the predominant social atmosphere. For example, she points to Lacroix's poofy sleeves and extravagant embellishments in the '80s as interpretations of the overall materialism and greed of the times as vividly depicted in the film Wall Street. It's these sorts of assessments that make Borrelli-Pearson an expert and, therefore, why the reader is left wondering why all this research is abbreviated into such a dizzingly dense introduction.
The book then transforms into a full-fledged photography book, with not so much as a caption accompanying each image. The result is befuddling, as we're visually transported back to one era, then forward, then back again, with not so much as a guide to help us understand what it is we're seeing. Sure, at the very end of the book, Borrelli-Pearson provides photography credits (all bunched together in a list-like, bibliography-esque style) that explain each cocktail dress pictured and its relevance, but the fact that these bits of text are located at the back of the book, as some sort of afterthought, shows just how disjointed the book's structure really is. Had the images been placed in some sort of chronological order (or even a thematic one) and been matched with some analytical yet light-hearted copy, this book would have been ten times as powerful. As it stands now, it's a rather watery cocktail.
(***)
Adam Bradley: Book of Rhymes: The Poetics of Hip Hop
In this dense, well-researched and extremely articulate work, Adam Bradley makes a powerful, didactic argument for why rap constitutes the most innovative and powerful form of poetry to emerge over the past few decades. Though he exhibits an intimate knowledge of rap music, citing verses from a range of artists including Rakim, Big Daddy Kane, Bun B, Jay-Z, Ludacris, Eminem, Common, Nas, Pharaohe Monch, Run-DMC, Busta Rhymes, and more, breaking down the way in which each manipulates words' syllabic breakdowns, how they alter the vocal stresses in different words, and how they create fascinating internal and end rhymes.
At the root of Bradley's thesis is the idea that poetry was born in rhythm, that it relies on the natural patterns found in living speech. Rap, too, relies on these speech rhythms but, unlike with literary poetry, rap allows MCs to reshape these speech patterns because of its relationship to the beat. MCs use their voices a instruments, expanding and contracting syllable counts, creating unexpected syllabic accents, and defying traditional pronunciations in order to create a rhythm that fits with (but is not subservient to) the beat.
Though it's extremely academic in nature and should be read with the care allotted to any significant piece of literary analysis, Book of Rhymes is much more than a haughty pedagogic text — it's a knockout argument for the validity of rap as an art form that both scholars and fans can relish.
(****)
Steve Rotman: San Francisco Street Art
Why does Prestel continue to publish these anemic street art books? I just don't get it. Mind you, I LOVE street art. I've been an admirer and advocate of graffiti art for as long as I can remember. But the problem with these books is that they have absolutely no substance. These aren't mini Subway Art titles, where there's a social anthropologist and a photographer capturing a booming artistic/cultural movement. This booklet is nothing more than a number of unimpressive snapshots of murals in San Francisco. Fine, some of the stencil art, graffiti pieces, and posters featured are mildly intriguing but what makes the book so dull is that the viewer can't help but think that anyone could've taken these photos (including him/her). And, of course, there is no information regarding the artists who labored to complete these works beyond a tiny bibliography of sorts (a one-page guide with the number of each page and the name of the artist whose work is featured on said page). (*)
Josefina López: Hungry Woman in Paris
The celebrated author of Real Women Have Curves returns with Hungry Woman in Paris, a deliciously indulgent, unabashedly candid and uninhibitedly sexy tale about Canela, a Mexican-American journalist who abandons her life in the U.S, and embarks on a trip to Paris in hopes of finding a new sense of purpose.
The story kicks off when Canela's cousin Luna passes away unexpectedly. Falling into a deep depression, Canela blows an important magazine deadline and decides she has no interest in continuing her journalism career. Adding to her woes, she has called off her engagement to a handsome doctor, incurring the criticism of her whole family.
Wanting to escape her whole world, Canela takes the tickets to her Parisian honeymoon and sets off on an adventure. After a week there, she decides to enroll in Le Coq Rouge, a prestigious cooking school — not necessarily because of an interest in cooking but because doing so will allow her to get a visa to remain in Paris.
Interestingly enough, as she finds herself in a strange city, she allows herself to experience life without inhibition and, in doing so, discovers how much she involves life's pleasures, particularly food and sex.
Lopez's ultra-detailed descriptions of her many sexual encounters will make any gal blush, but this isn't just some ravenous, sexcapade-filled romance novel. Peppered in the tale are intelligent observations about race relations in Paris and in the U.S., anecdotes about the experiences of undocumented Mexicans in the U.S., the exoticization of Latinas in the U.S. and abroad, and more. A savory tale, Hungry Woman in Paris is an ideal summer read.
(****)
Stumble It!
