SICKA THAN AVERAGE

Penelope
A modern fairy tale, but what makes this one dope is that it doesn't involve heroes coming to save anyone. Penelope kinda saves herself on this one... My only critique: Ricci looks better with a pig snout than most regular women walking the streets, so it's hard to fathom people viewing her as such a monster and jumping out of windows to run away from her! LOL (***)

Vantage Point (Single-Disc Edition)
A near-perfect suspense flick, this joint will have you biting your nails only 5 minutes into the action. There are some Ronin-esque car chases, beaucoup plot twists, and many, many things that go boom. (****)

Tyler Perry's Meet The Browns
I'm not a Tyler Perry hater -- I actually really respect that cat's hustle. But this movie was just so full of cliches that I could barely sit through it. Hate to say it, but Tyler went with the most predictable story line: poor but strong woman in distress whose fate changes when an unexpected tragedy brings her closer to family (and, of course, God). Oh, and she finds a man who is perfect and wants to take care of her and her three kids (yeah, friggin' right!). Man, listen, as a single mom, I'm straight-up mad about this tomfoolery. What, are we supposed to believe some long-lost family members are going to put our babies through college and get us a house? Puh-leeze. (**)

24: Season One (Special Edition)
Jack Bauer racing against time, double agents, and assassination plots made Season One a nailbiter. Revisit the season and enjoy over three hours of never-before-seen special features. (****)

Weeds - Season Three
It ain't quite as good as the first and second seasons, but Mary-Louise Parker is still my hero. How do I get her job? Geesh. (***)

Lipstick Jungle - Season One
Lindsay Pierce is beyond lovable as down-on-her-luck designer Victory Ford and while Brooke Shields and Kim Raver aren't quite as endearing, they do keep you entertained with plenty of marriage-related drama and professional challenges. Sure, it's not Sex and the City, but it's still entertaining in that girl-power way.. (****)

Jumper
I had high hopes fort his flick which, at least conceptually, seemed interesting and fresh. But the convoluted, nonsensical plot, the lack of story development, and Hayden Christensen's flat performance all lead to a laughable flick. And don't even get me started on Samuel L. Jackson's absurd hairdo... (*)

Marvel Heroes Collection (Daredevil, Elektra, X-Men, X2, X-Men 3: The Last Stand, Fantastic Four & Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer)
This 8-disc box set features the stellar X-Men trilogy and the two Fantastic Four flicks (the first one is a banger), as well as the lukewarm Elektra and the diastrous (but entertaining in its wackness) Daredevil. Plus, there's an animated title for hardcore comic book heads. Definitely a collectors' item! (***)

Over Her Dead Body
Why Eva Longoria would choose to co-star with Jason Biggs is beyond me... And the whole notion of her being a wretched ghost who tortures her former boyfriend's new girl? So very wack. (*)

I'm Not There
Cate Blanchett cross-dressing to play Bob Dylan? Genius. And Marcus Carl Franklin is a star-in-the making. (****)

Method Man: Method Man
Meth is enterprising like a mothaf***a. From his roles on The Wire and The Wackness to his new graphic novel, dude is hustlin' harder than Rick Ross. This eponymous graphic novel is kinetic from start to end -- Sanford Greene's illustrations are as dynamic as they come, which means blunt-sparkin', sword-wielding, monster-stompin' action. The storyline makes little sense, but hey, at least the artwork will keep you looking...Oh, and just as an FYI, RZA has a graphic novel coming out soon, too. Word to the Wu. (***)

Sacha Jenkins and Dave Villorente: Piecebook: The Secret Drawings of Graffiti Writers
Dave Villorente (a.k.a. Chino) is my homie, so of course I'm going to support anything he spearheads. The concept driving this book is rather original. From the way it's bound to the way it's arranged, it does very much look like like a graffiti writer's blackbook — well, except, some of these are straight from the archives (Wane's 1987 "bear" piece, the "Lady Pink With Black Skull" drawing, TKid's "Love Is" drawing, etc.), so it would have to be an OG writer's book, ya dig?. The pages filled with tags and bubble letters are, of course, strictly for graff nerds like myself who stare at the way different cats shape their letters. I also love how the back of the book has a list of illustrations and attributions to porperly credit everyone's art. The only thing I don't understand is why Sacha Jenkins is even involved with this. Dude never got busy on the trains like THAT, and his ties with YN (y'all who know hip-hop, know who I speak of), just brought his stock down in my book... Next time, holla at me, Chino. But hey, all in all, it's a solid art book... (***)

Marisa Silver: The God of War: A Novel
No, this book has nothing to do with City of God, that Wesley Snipes Art of War flick, or anything of the sort. In fact, it has nothing to do with war at all (except, perhaps, the silent wars that happen at home or the emotional skirmishes within each of us). Nah, the name has to do with the title character, Ares (note: the same name as the Greek god of war), who must bear the guilt of a childhood mistake with him... Silver is one to watch in the literary world. (****)

Caren Anderson: Black Velvet Masterpieces: Highlights from the Collection of the Velveteria Museum
Painting on black velvet requires a particular skillset, which is explained here, as is the history of the art form. The highlight, of course, are the 275+ reproductions of some of the pieces considered "masterpieces." The "Polynesian Paradise" section includes some beautiful nudes (particularly those by Burke Tyree) and the "Nudes From Around the World" section also includes some impressive paintings. The "Black Power" section, however, is disappointing -- though it features paintings of Oprah, Dr. King, Malcolm X and Mr. T, none of them actually resemble these boldfaced names (in fact, they look like low-brow caricatures). And the section on clowns terrifed me (but then again, I have a phobia of clowns altogether, so I may not be the ebst judge on that!)... All in all, you may wanna leaf through it, but it's not worthy of the coveted space in your bookshelf. (**)

Haruki Murakami: After Dark (Vintage International)
Murakami unleashes another tour de force with this surreal, magical novel which explores how loneliness can exist in the most crowded of cities, how much distance there can be between lovers, siblings, and friends, how thought and action are intertwined, the delicate moral fiber of human beings, and how our past can define our futures. (*****)

Mike Dawson: Freddie & Me: A Coming-of-Age (Bohemian) Rhapsody
Whether you were a rampant fan of Freddie Mercury and QUEEN or you just knew them from random references in flicks like Wayne's World, you'all appreciate this graphic novel/coming-of-age tale about one how fan's memories are set to a particular soundtrack. (****)

David Sedaris: When You Are Engulfed in Flames
The acclaimed humorist returns with his sixth book, which tackles a lot of nothing (in that Seinfeld-esque way) brilliantly.

David Belisle (photographer): R.E.M: Hello
For the past six years, lensman David Belisle has been touring with the band responsible for suc hits as "Losing My Religion" and "Shiny Happy People." The result: 175 images with hand-written captions by the band, and an introspective introduction by Michael Stipe. (****)

Yoshitomo Nara: The Lonesome Puppy
Yoshitomo Nara is hands-down one of the best Japanese artists of this era, and this children's book marries his precious illustrations with a quaint story about an unlikely friendship. (****)

Etgar Keret: The Girl on the Fridge: Stories
This Israeli writer's stories are funny and odd, but also address poignant aspects of the human condition.